Two days ago, I told my husband that I was feeling a little tired but that I intended to keep going as long as I could keep going. Well, today is when it all came to a halt.
My recent workouts have been good. I've really enjoyed them and I've felt strong and fast (for me - it's all relative). Things have been good. I am very happy with how my training is going.
However, last night I barely slept, despite my fatigue. When my alarm clock rang at 5:15 to wake me for my swim, I lay there, thinking about whether I could even move my arms around in the water; I just couldn't imagine doing it. I felt horribly guilty but I turned off my clock and rolled over. Sadly, I didn't even fall asleep but I couldn't have moved if I tried. I cancelled one of the three classes I have to teach today - the one I could afford to get one class behind in - and I plan to go home and sleep instead. Tonight, I should be going to spin class but I can hardly bear the thought of the usual Wednesday night brutal spin workout. If I miss the spin it also means that I have to find someone to cover for me since I am the coordinator of our club's spin season. This compounds my guilt.
I guess I've been wondering how long I could manage the pace of things without it taking its toll. My teaching load is very heavy and my training is increasing and I think it has caught up with me a little. I know I'll be OK if I am kind to myself today. I don't think this means anything monumental. I am just tired. I am still committed to my goal and my training but today is most definitely going to be a day off.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Halfway
It has now been five months since I started my formal training program for Ironman and I have five more months to go until the race.
My training encountered a few bumps along the way in the first few months but things have been much better since December, when I started working with my "gurus."
I keep a log of my workouts and a running total of what I've done. Here are my totals for the last five months:
Swimming 73,300 metres
Cycling 1275 kilometres
Running 377 kilometres
Weights 43 workouts (each about 45 minutes long)
In the first 3 months of my training, I had almost no cycling in my schedule and swimming was mainly technical instruction rather than distance. Now there is a better balance among the three sports. In the second half of my training program, I will be building even more and I will do much more than these distances in the next five months.
I do get tired sometimes but it's not all because of the training. My working life has been stressful and it's the dead of winter, which, at least for me, is not a high energy period. I am taking care of myself and carrying on.
I feel that things are going well and I am starting to have more confidence that I can do the race. I struggle with confidence so it's nice to feel a glimmer of hope every now and again.
To top it all off, I have lost 18 pounds since I started training and that feels awesome!
My training encountered a few bumps along the way in the first few months but things have been much better since December, when I started working with my "gurus."
I keep a log of my workouts and a running total of what I've done. Here are my totals for the last five months:
Swimming 73,300 metres
Cycling 1275 kilometres
Running 377 kilometres
Weights 43 workouts (each about 45 minutes long)
In the first 3 months of my training, I had almost no cycling in my schedule and swimming was mainly technical instruction rather than distance. Now there is a better balance among the three sports. In the second half of my training program, I will be building even more and I will do much more than these distances in the next five months.
I do get tired sometimes but it's not all because of the training. My working life has been stressful and it's the dead of winter, which, at least for me, is not a high energy period. I am taking care of myself and carrying on.
I feel that things are going well and I am starting to have more confidence that I can do the race. I struggle with confidence so it's nice to feel a glimmer of hope every now and again.
To top it all off, I have lost 18 pounds since I started training and that feels awesome!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Holiday Survival
Christmas can be hard on diets and exercise routines but I am very happy with how things went for me this year. I went into the Christmas season with very high motivation to focus on a good diet and keep my training going. I was faithful with my workouts and I even lost a couple of pounds. On Dec 31, I went to spin class and then quickly rushed home so we could head off to the airport. We went with my dad and his wife on a week long cruise in the Caribbean. We saw Honduras, Belize, and Mexico. The Caribbean is lovely, of course, and the ocean is warm and clean and wonderful. I swam in the ocean in Cozumel and could easily imagine myself doing an Ironman there someday...But I am definitely getting ahead of myself with that thought!
Of course there is food everywhere on a cruise but I ate very carefully and I also worked out every day. The fitness centre on the ship was excellent. I did a couple of spin classes and used the treadmill a few times. Try running on a treadmill on a ship that is rocking in rough seas! Now that's a challenge! One second you feel like you're running up a huge hill, the next second you are slammed into the front of the treadmill. Put that together with constant side to side motion. It's definitely a skill to be learned and perfected. I am happy to report that I did not gain any weight on the trip and I managed to keep my training at a respectable level while we were away. I even swam 100 lengths of the very freezing cold 10 metre pool at our Florida hotel, just to get a little swim in.
I am happy to be home and back into the routine of training and teaching, although the weather here is not quite as nice as it was down there!
Of course there is food everywhere on a cruise but I ate very carefully and I also worked out every day. The fitness centre on the ship was excellent. I did a couple of spin classes and used the treadmill a few times. Try running on a treadmill on a ship that is rocking in rough seas! Now that's a challenge! One second you feel like you're running up a huge hill, the next second you are slammed into the front of the treadmill. Put that together with constant side to side motion. It's definitely a skill to be learned and perfected. I am happy to report that I did not gain any weight on the trip and I managed to keep my training at a respectable level while we were away. I even swam 100 lengths of the very freezing cold 10 metre pool at our Florida hotel, just to get a little swim in.
I am happy to be home and back into the routine of training and teaching, although the weather here is not quite as nice as it was down there!
Friday, December 16, 2011
All is Well
Things are ticking along. I am swimming, biking, running and lifting weights as I should be. I feel good and my body is happy. My “gurus” are wonderful. They are providing me with structure, advice, support, and the occasional chill-out-and-stop-panicking-about-signing-up-for-an-Ironman talk. The workouts are building now, although the balance among them is good. I have also lost nine pounds since I started training in earnest (September), half of them this month, and that feels good, too.
Today is my last day at my awful job in the hospital. (I wrote about this earlier.) Although I am now quite used to working in a structured, full-time job, the job itself has been dissatisfying and I am glad to be moving on. I will be teaching three courses in the sociology department for the January to April term so it will be crazy but it will also be very nice to be back in academia. I have also just accepted an offer of a professor position at the university, which will start July 1. That gives me May and June off, which might be just perfect timing because I’ll be doing some long, long workouts then and I’ll have time for them!
Hopefully, I will be an Ironwoman when I start that job! I’m doing all I can to make that happen and I am grateful for the friends who are on this journey with me.
Today is my last day at my awful job in the hospital. (I wrote about this earlier.) Although I am now quite used to working in a structured, full-time job, the job itself has been dissatisfying and I am glad to be moving on. I will be teaching three courses in the sociology department for the January to April term so it will be crazy but it will also be very nice to be back in academia. I have also just accepted an offer of a professor position at the university, which will start July 1. That gives me May and June off, which might be just perfect timing because I’ll be doing some long, long workouts then and I’ll have time for them!
Hopefully, I will be an Ironwoman when I start that job! I’m doing all I can to make that happen and I am grateful for the friends who are on this journey with me.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
A New Beginning
I have been training faithfully over the last three months, since starting the training plan with my coaches. As you know, the training hasn't always gone very well, particularly the running. I tried to work things out with my coaches but it was hard to negotiate a different approach to running and, although my one coach did "allow" me to do some water running, I was still running five days a week, which was just not working for me. As well, I was starting to worry about my swimming volume (or lack thereof). Swim training has focused on technique, which has been excellent, but it has been at the expense of distance. Some weeks, I was swimming a grand total of 1200 metres and I was starting to think that maybe I should pick that up a bit. My coach just told me not to worry. More and more it seemed like we just weren't seeing eye to eye completely. They were very kind and positive and I know they have a lot of knowledge but there was just a disconnection philosophically. So, two weeks ago, I very kindly thanked them for what they had done for me and told them that I was going to launch out on my own.
It was the right decision and I don't regret it but for these last two weeks, I have felt a little bit lost, unsure of how to fill in my training plan. I looked at a few plans, got some ideas in my mind, and continued to work out but I felt I was floundering a little. Then a wonderful thing happened....
My friend from my triathlon club, who has done seven Ironmans, and her friend, who has done two, decided they wanted to support and guide me through my training. They won't be official coaches but they will be my cheerleaders and gurus and they will provide me with a training plan and some answers to the questions that will inevitably arise as I go along. I asked them why they wanted to do this for me (for free) and they said it was because they cared about me and just wanted to see me do this.
We met over coffee today and talked about how I should structure my week as far as workouts go. For now, I will swim three times a week with the swim training group that is offered through the City. I'll spin twice a week with the triathlon club and I'll run three times a week on my own, scaling back a bit to allow myself to recover from all the running I did this fall and then gradually building back up. Eventually I will do more than this but this is how it will look for December and into January. Their philosophy is that I should focus more on the swim and bike than the run so I can get out of the water feeling good and gain some time on the bike course so I have plenty of time for the run. This makes sense to me and it is the opposite of what I have been doing, which was to run and run and run and then fall apart! They expressed confidence in my ability to complete this crazy race and reminded me, when I seemed uncertain, that my training has only just begun and that I will feel strong and confident by the time I'm standing on that beach.
I feel good about this. With them, I have some support and structure and also some flexibility and understanding. I am motivated to do this training and I have a basic idea of how to get it done but it'll be great to have guidance and a sounding board and some experience to tap into for this first time through.
It was the right decision and I don't regret it but for these last two weeks, I have felt a little bit lost, unsure of how to fill in my training plan. I looked at a few plans, got some ideas in my mind, and continued to work out but I felt I was floundering a little. Then a wonderful thing happened....
My friend from my triathlon club, who has done seven Ironmans, and her friend, who has done two, decided they wanted to support and guide me through my training. They won't be official coaches but they will be my cheerleaders and gurus and they will provide me with a training plan and some answers to the questions that will inevitably arise as I go along. I asked them why they wanted to do this for me (for free) and they said it was because they cared about me and just wanted to see me do this.
We met over coffee today and talked about how I should structure my week as far as workouts go. For now, I will swim three times a week with the swim training group that is offered through the City. I'll spin twice a week with the triathlon club and I'll run three times a week on my own, scaling back a bit to allow myself to recover from all the running I did this fall and then gradually building back up. Eventually I will do more than this but this is how it will look for December and into January. Their philosophy is that I should focus more on the swim and bike than the run so I can get out of the water feeling good and gain some time on the bike course so I have plenty of time for the run. This makes sense to me and it is the opposite of what I have been doing, which was to run and run and run and then fall apart! They expressed confidence in my ability to complete this crazy race and reminded me, when I seemed uncertain, that my training has only just begun and that I will feel strong and confident by the time I'm standing on that beach.
I feel good about this. With them, I have some support and structure and also some flexibility and understanding. I am motivated to do this training and I have a basic idea of how to get it done but it'll be great to have guidance and a sounding board and some experience to tap into for this first time through.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Happiness is...
…a revised training plan!
After swim practice this morning, I talked to my coach about moving forward with my training in a way that won’t destroy my body. He had told me a couple days ago that I could substitute water running for running on land so today he gave me a quick lesson on how to do it properly. It isn’t difficult and I got the hang of it pretty easily and he told me a trick I can use to monitor and correct my form from time to time. So, I should be good to go. I’ll still be doing 5 runs per week but I think I will be able to handle that if it’s in the water. It hasn’t been the volume of training that’s been difficult (not yet anyway!); it’s just been the impact of running.
He also said that he is going to add another swim to my schedule so that I have an opportunity to do some long, continuous swims. I’ve been swimming with his training group twice a week but we focus a lot on technique and don’t actually do a lot of distance – often only 800 metres in an hour. It’s fantastic instruction and over time we’ll be going farther but I am glad that I’ll be going to the pool for a third workout each week from now on so I can build my endurance.
I get back on my bike, on the trainer, this weekend. I’ve missed my bike and I hope I haven’t lost too much fitness. But heading into spin season with my triathlon club will take care of that for sure!
I am optimistic that I am on a better path now.
After swim practice this morning, I talked to my coach about moving forward with my training in a way that won’t destroy my body. He had told me a couple days ago that I could substitute water running for running on land so today he gave me a quick lesson on how to do it properly. It isn’t difficult and I got the hang of it pretty easily and he told me a trick I can use to monitor and correct my form from time to time. So, I should be good to go. I’ll still be doing 5 runs per week but I think I will be able to handle that if it’s in the water. It hasn’t been the volume of training that’s been difficult (not yet anyway!); it’s just been the impact of running.
He also said that he is going to add another swim to my schedule so that I have an opportunity to do some long, continuous swims. I’ve been swimming with his training group twice a week but we focus a lot on technique and don’t actually do a lot of distance – often only 800 metres in an hour. It’s fantastic instruction and over time we’ll be going farther but I am glad that I’ll be going to the pool for a third workout each week from now on so I can build my endurance.
I get back on my bike, on the trainer, this weekend. I’ve missed my bike and I hope I haven’t lost too much fitness. But heading into spin season with my triathlon club will take care of that for sure!
I am optimistic that I am on a better path now.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Learning to Trust Myself
Friends who have done an Ironman have told me that I will learn a lot about myself during my training. At the beginning of Week 9 of my training, I can already say that I'm learning, but it isn't what I might have expected. I thought I would learn about perseverence or how much inner strength I had or something like that but instead I am learning that I should trust myself more.
A couple weeks ago, I posted a question on a running forum asking people to share what they had learned about themselves during their own Ironman training. I got three or four very personal and inspiring responses. The rest, however, were not helpful. A couple of people, one in particular, read into my question and made some assumptions about my motivations and the importance I was placing on my training experience. All I wanted to know was what others had learned about themselves. Instead what I got was a lot of condescending advice that wasn't relevant to me, based on what someone who doesn't know me and didn't listen to me thought they needed to say. I regretted asking the question in the first place and figured that I should have just waited to see what learning emerged from my own training.
This week, I am having a very different experience but one that is leading me to a similar conclusion. I am having a lot of trouble with running. As my three faithful readers will know, I have bad arthritis in my hip. My sports doc and physiotherapist said I could train for an Ironman, as long as I "trained differently." My coach interpreted that to mean that I should run short distances very often. So I am running 5 times per week. I am swimming only twice and haven't been cycling at all for two months, except for one week last month when I took a break from running. My coach has a lot of experience and I trust that he knows about training. When he gave me this weird training program, I trusted that this was going to be right for me and that his rationale made sense. Still, he knows training but he doesn't know me. I know me, though, and I need to step up to the plate and represent myself. I know that this is not going to work. I am falling apart. Five runs per week is not allowing me to recover. I am at the point where I can hardly walk, let alone run. Meanwhile, swimming and cycling, which do not hurt me, are taking a back seat. I feel like maybe I should be swimming and cycling more. My coach has told me that I can substitute water running for running on land but it doesn't sound like the proportions of training for the three sports will be adjusted in my plan. I get it that I need to trust my coach but I also hope to see some flexibility in light of the evidence that things are not going well. For some people, this would just be an ordinary conversation with their coach but for me it takes a conscious level of trust in myself to acknowledge that what I'm experiencing is valid and therefore worth bringing up.
Although this is not a sport-specific example, I had another moment that prompted me to think differently about myself. This past week, I had an interview for a faculty position at the university. During the interview, one person asked me what I would do to begin to develop my work independently. I had been talking about opportunities I could see for collaborative research and I guess he wanted to clarify whether I was also thinking about myself as an independent researcher. It was a little "aha" moment for me. Making the transition from doctoral student to faculty member means that I would have to focus on the unique perspective that I would bring to the faculty and learn to trust it so it can develop.
Now, I do believe in learning from others, seeking advice, sharing knowledge, and working collaboratively. But, I think I need to start thinking of myself as someone who already knows something, someone who is ready for a new, important, independent, personal challenge - whether it be taking on the Iron distance or becoming a professor. I need to do this in a way that fits for me, in a way that respects what more seasoned people can offer to me and includes my own perspective and knowledge.
It's amazing how life experiences come together to create a lesson. This is a good one for me and I'm sure there will be more as I prepare for next year's BIG adventure in triathlon.
A couple weeks ago, I posted a question on a running forum asking people to share what they had learned about themselves during their own Ironman training. I got three or four very personal and inspiring responses. The rest, however, were not helpful. A couple of people, one in particular, read into my question and made some assumptions about my motivations and the importance I was placing on my training experience. All I wanted to know was what others had learned about themselves. Instead what I got was a lot of condescending advice that wasn't relevant to me, based on what someone who doesn't know me and didn't listen to me thought they needed to say. I regretted asking the question in the first place and figured that I should have just waited to see what learning emerged from my own training.
This week, I am having a very different experience but one that is leading me to a similar conclusion. I am having a lot of trouble with running. As my three faithful readers will know, I have bad arthritis in my hip. My sports doc and physiotherapist said I could train for an Ironman, as long as I "trained differently." My coach interpreted that to mean that I should run short distances very often. So I am running 5 times per week. I am swimming only twice and haven't been cycling at all for two months, except for one week last month when I took a break from running. My coach has a lot of experience and I trust that he knows about training. When he gave me this weird training program, I trusted that this was going to be right for me and that his rationale made sense. Still, he knows training but he doesn't know me. I know me, though, and I need to step up to the plate and represent myself. I know that this is not going to work. I am falling apart. Five runs per week is not allowing me to recover. I am at the point where I can hardly walk, let alone run. Meanwhile, swimming and cycling, which do not hurt me, are taking a back seat. I feel like maybe I should be swimming and cycling more. My coach has told me that I can substitute water running for running on land but it doesn't sound like the proportions of training for the three sports will be adjusted in my plan. I get it that I need to trust my coach but I also hope to see some flexibility in light of the evidence that things are not going well. For some people, this would just be an ordinary conversation with their coach but for me it takes a conscious level of trust in myself to acknowledge that what I'm experiencing is valid and therefore worth bringing up.
Although this is not a sport-specific example, I had another moment that prompted me to think differently about myself. This past week, I had an interview for a faculty position at the university. During the interview, one person asked me what I would do to begin to develop my work independently. I had been talking about opportunities I could see for collaborative research and I guess he wanted to clarify whether I was also thinking about myself as an independent researcher. It was a little "aha" moment for me. Making the transition from doctoral student to faculty member means that I would have to focus on the unique perspective that I would bring to the faculty and learn to trust it so it can develop.
Now, I do believe in learning from others, seeking advice, sharing knowledge, and working collaboratively. But, I think I need to start thinking of myself as someone who already knows something, someone who is ready for a new, important, independent, personal challenge - whether it be taking on the Iron distance or becoming a professor. I need to do this in a way that fits for me, in a way that respects what more seasoned people can offer to me and includes my own perspective and knowledge.
It's amazing how life experiences come together to create a lesson. This is a good one for me and I'm sure there will be more as I prepare for next year's BIG adventure in triathlon.
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